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Senior Member

Posts: 245


Jun 7 14 2:49 PM

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Draft Guys over 60

I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm
too old to track down terrorists. You can't
be older than 42 to join the military.

They've got the whole thing backwards.
Instead of sending 18-year olds off to fight,
they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't
be able to join a military unit until you're
at least 35.

For starters, researchers say 18-year-olds
think about sex every 10 seconds. Old guys
only think about sex a couple of times a
month, leaving us more than 280,000
additional seconds per day to concentrate on
the enemy.

Young guys haven't lived long enough to be
cranky, and a cranky soldier is a dangerous
soldier. 'My back hurts! I can't sleep, I'm
tired and hungry.' We are bad-tempered and
impatient, and maybe letting us kill some
terrorist that desperately deserves it will
make us feel better and shut us up for a

An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up
before 10am. Old guys always get up early to
go to the bathroom. Besides, like I said, I'm
tired and can't sleep and since I'm already
up, I may as well be up killing some
fanatical terrorist.

If captured we couldn't spill the beans
because we'd forget where we put them. In
fact, name, rank, and serial number would be
a real brainteaser.

Boot camp would be easier for old guys..
We're used to getting screamed and yelled at
and we're used to soft food. We've also
developed an appreciation for guns. We've
been using them for years as an excuse to get
out of the house, away from the screaming and

They could lighten up on the obstacle course
however... I've been in combat and never saw
a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over
the side, nor did I ever do any pushups after
completing basic training.

Actually, the running part is kind of a waste
of energy, too... I've never seen anyone
outrun a bullet.

An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of
him. He's still learning to shave, to start a
conversation with a pretty girl. He still
hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a
brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his

These are all great reasons to keep our kids
at home to learn a little more about life
before sending them off into harm's way.
Let us old guys track down those terrorists.

The last thing an enemy would want to see is
a couple million Old men with bad attitudes
and automatic weapons, who know that their
best years are already behind them.

HEY!! How about recruiting Women over
menopause!!! You think MEN have attitudes??
 If nothing else, put them on border patrol.
They'll have it secured the first night!

Send this to all of your senior
in big type so they can read it.

Romans 1:17, For in the gospel a righteousness from God is revealed, a righteousness that is by faith from first to last, just as it is written:"The righteous will live by faith."

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